Once in a Blue Moon, a Sea Breeze was blowing through the windows of Bar Acqua.  It was a Dark and Stormy night, it was my 40th birthday and Margarita the nanny was nowhere to be found.  I rang her and said, “Margarita, where the Bloody Mary are you?”

” I Pina Colada shopping”, she said

“Are you Bellini lying to me?” I asked.  ‘I’m going Tequila ‘, I thought.

“Don’t be Angostura Bitter“, she said, “I was buying you a birthday pressie!”

“Oh, don’t mind me”, I said, “my Bacardi is worse than my bite, “I’m just having a bit of a Harvey Wallbanger.”

At that moment, the fire alarm began to Woo-Woo.  Oh Schnapps, this was another fine Mimosa I’d gotten into….so armed with just a Rusty Nail and a Screwdriver, I fixed it.  Thank the Lord, it was a Mojito.

The show must go on, thought.

I was having a Pisco Sour up for my B52 and all my Martini’s were coming to help me celebrate.

An old flame arrived first, “Brandy Alexander?” I asked,

“No, I’m feeling a bit of a Zombie, can I have a Long Island Iced Tea instead?”

“Alex, what’s different about you?”

“Is it Mai Tai?”

“No, it’s a bit Old Fashioned“, I replied, “I think it’s your Gimlet eyes”.

“Thanks a lot”, he said, “No Sex on the Beach for you tonight.”

“Oh Singapore Sling your hook,” I said, “you’re having a Blue Lagoon.”

Luckily, more guests started arriving, so it didn’t Snowball.  We all danced the night away. My favourites were Dancing Queen by Absinthe and Like a Virgin Mary by Midori.

One of the guests was a Kir Royale pain in the Horse’s Neck, hoovering up all the food and refusing to Buck’s Fizz off home until the Bitter Lemon end.  What a Flaming Sambucca.

Still, the party went on until Tequila Sunrise and was an Absolut sucess.  Can’t wait for the next one…it’s going to be a Jaeger bomb.